The Lorax this, the Lorax that. When are we going to talk about Dr. Seus’s greatest, hottest, most beastiality-inducing creation: The Cat In The Hat, a 2003 film and cinematic masterpiece? I’m tired of hearing about how “everybody needs a thneed” — who’s “everybody”? I reject this capitalistic agenda. I...
Article published by the Young Americans for Science (YAS) In a recent landmark decision, the Supreme Court voted 6-3 in favor of overturning the Bill of Rights and all additional amendments to the United States Constitution. The majority opinion relied heavily upon an originalist interpretation of the Constitution and stated...
By Jeff Malarky I paid $566,996 to Uncle Sam last year in federal income taxes. I threw in another $95,968 to the dear old governor of New Jersey, $47,438 to my accountant based in Grand Cayman, and $10,000 to my favorite charity, RIM (Raise Income Minimums, which seeks to prevent...
By Slant Staff Look, tornadoes are no joke and neither is this protocol. We all know the warning signs for a tornado (I actually did not and had to google them), but if you hear a noise that sounds like a freight train over the sound of your sex playlist,...
ConcernedAboutCock It’s 7:37 PM on a Saturday night. I have no plans other than walking to the Commons Munchie Mart and buying myself a strawberry banana smoothie that I 140 percent believe has the same ingredients as the ones at McDonald’s. As I embark on my travels, I cast a...
