“Becky was the hottest girl in the grade, and everyone knew that she was a shoo-in for Juliet,” Freeman said, explaining his rationale in dulcet tones. “All I had to do was get the part of Romeo, and I was golden!”
After an arduous two hours of your Multivariable Calculus final, it’s time to celebrate. Break out your apron with The Slant and join us in baking brownies that will make you forget your worries.
“Ah, shit.” Sources report hearing those words leave the window of Brian Shaker’s Chevy Impala on Thursday afternoon.
“There just aren’t enough chairs to go around,” experts reported Tuesday. “Every day, thousands of people try to sit down only to find that there aren’t enough chairs left for them.”
“We just handed him a pencil, some grid paper, and access to the city planning documents, and he was ready to go,” Rebecca Fardle said. “It was pure art from the beginning.”
