Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons. Tampons.
“You were the dude I threw up on at the frat party last weekend. I was the blonde wearing green, and my red Solo cup bounced off your dadbod when I fell off the stage.”
“Becky was the hottest girl in the grade, and everyone knew that she was a shoo-in for Juliet,” Freeman said, explaining his rationale in dulcet tones. “All I had to do was get the part of Romeo, and I was golden!”
After an arduous two hours of your Multivariable Calculus final, it’s time to celebrate. Break out your apron with The Slant and join us in baking brownies that will make you forget your worries.
“Ah, shit.” Sources report hearing those words leave the window of Brian Shaker’s Chevy Impala on Thursday afternoon.
