ConcernedAboutCock It’s 7:37 PM on a Saturday night. I have no plans other than walking to the Commons Munchie Mart and buying myself a strawberry banana smoothie that I 140 percent believe has the same ingredients as the ones at McDonald’s. As I embark on my travels, I cast a...
By Fluke Baller The art of the Friendzone is a delicate one. You may find yourself balancing an immense hatred for her boyfriend with all the unrequited pining one can muster, all while keeping your feelings hidden at all costs. It’s a dangerous game. Only the strongest and worthiest among...
By Nick Gebo It’s the beginning of a new semester! Spring is coming and things are looking up. Better yet, a new semester can mean a brand new, reimagined you. It’s the perfect time to evaluate your life, your goals and adjust your path to set yourself up for future...
Who would have thought a name could cause so much controversy? Beloved, prestigious satire publication The Slant recently fell under intense legal fire. The publication’s name was created by Editor-in-Chief Sam “Jesus” Sliman as a cheeky play on the idea that the news publication is biased (or “slanted”). However, as...
I don’t believe in Astrology. There I said it. But the arbitrary-personality-categorizing-hill I will die on is the Myers–Briggs Personality test. With this personality test, the more than eight billion people on this globe can fit so conveniently (and accurately!) into 16 personality types. The second rarest personality is the...
