In yet another incredible week for girlbosses everywhere, Kamala Harris continues to make strides for women’s rights after being appointed President Joe Biden’s point woman for the border crisis and creating the policy of Girlboss, Gatekeep, Gaslight. The Biden administration has been lauded for its attempts at unity. According to insiders, “We noticed how much […]
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The Best (and Worst) Disney Channel Original Movies to Play During Your First Belmont Tinder Hookup
Hookup culture, you hate to see it and yet you love to partake in it. Meeting someone organically is an immediate no, and meeting someone from Vandy is high risk with no reward. And thus the universe created Belmont men who exist solely in the Tinder realm. So without further adieu, I present to you […]
Help! My Grandma Said She Was Leaving to Go Buy Biscotti, but Now She’s in Panama City Beach?
To say I’m confused would be an understatement. It was a simple Sunday morning. We went to Waffle House (an odd choice for her), enjoyed a nice cup of tea and attended morning mass. I should have noticed something was off. Instead of accepting wine from the chalice, Meemaw pulled out a wine bag and […]
When the Immersion Vanderbilt Mob Came for Me
By Hewlett Packin My name is Hewlett Packin and I’m a sophomore at Vanderbilt University majoring in Economics and Human and Organizational Development. Throughout my life, I’ve always felt like an outsider. My family is white and pretty much middle-income, from The Hamptons, New York. Because my parents valued my education, they enrolled me at […]
MAIN CHARACTERS, THIS IS YOUR SIGN: Finish the Semester With All Eyes on You!
By Cameron Peloso Like any healthy adult, I spent most of my childhood years watching TV shows that were way too mature for me. “Gossip Girl,” “90210,” “Degrassi:” the classics. I haven’t just convinced myself I’m the main character, I know I am. And as the main character, it is my humble right to live […]
Best Taste of Nashville Restaurants to Get a Taste of This Dick
After the overwhelming response (0 comments) and professional interest (all of us got invited to write for SNL) that stemmed from our fuckable statues article, The Slant has decided to continue sharing our expertise with the student body. Whether your roommate isn’t leaving or the allure of planking over your partner on an ancient twin […]
If Yoda Wrote an Article About Free-Market Capitalism
*Narrated by Yoda as The Godfather music plays in the background. Click the link for the full experience.* In the words of one of the greatest philosophers to ever live: “The Sith are the most spoiled, most self-centered, most narcissistic generation the galaxy’s ever produced.” If you disagree, the question of if they aren’t narcissistic […]
Campus
A Comprehensive Guide of Places to Cry Near Campus for HOD Majors Who Just Failed Their First Baby Bio Exam
For those of you who feel like the Peabody core requirements are “just as intense as AXLE” and couldn’t study for BCSI 1100 because you are SO close to landing that McKinsey gig, this is for you. The gender neutral bathroom in Elliston by the mail room Literally no one knows this is a thing. […]
A Comprehensive Guide to Executive Board Applications
It’s officially spring here in Nashville and high pollen levels aren’t the only thing putting tears in the eyes of the student body. Yes, it’s board application time, when unqualified applicants in their dads’ blazers answer ridiculous questions from equally unqualified board members, all to vie for presidency of the Vanderbilt Oral-B Toothbrush Club. After […]
Seven Discreet Ways People Said They Were Pledging
After several months of complete degradation for a crumb of social acceptance, you’ve finally become an official member of your favorite frat. Nice going bro! That’s so ferda! Unfortunately, this probably means you’ve been an dick to everybody else in your life since at least January, but don’t worry! They can’t be mad at you […]
Top 5 Improvements the GET App Desperately Needs
Although it might be a bit of a stretch comparing ordering food on the GET app to the Iranian Hostage Crisis… actually I’m not gonna finish that. Anyways, I can’t be the only one having problems with this dumpster baby of an app, so while we wait for IT to abort these issues, I thought […]
A Comprehensive Guide to the Slant vs. Hustler Beef from a Very Unbiased Source
August 1886: The Slant, Vanderbilt University’s humor and satire publication, was founded by an elite group of students who aimed to bring laughter and social commentary to the student body a mere 13 years after the University’s founding. Named after Cornelius Vanderbilt’s penis, this new organization recruited the brightest and tightest the campus had to […]
Rating the Statues on Campus by How Fuckable They Are
7/10 Sleek, sexy but a little bit boring. This statue is nothing exciting, but definitely worth the fuck. The hole in the middle makes things pretty easy, but if you’re willing to put in the effort, you can probably do better. 1/10 NO. Do not even think about it. This is by far the least […]