By Charles Dorkins Once upon a time —of all the good days in the year, on Christmas Eve— Daniel Diermeier sat busy in his home office, drawing up schemes to ensure Vanderbilt University became #1 in the world, and he, its #1 chancellor. His most recent gambit – slowly replacing...

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  • December 25, 2023

By Nick Gebo and Sam Sliman It’s that time of year again. As the season of course evaluations rolls around, we, as seasoned experts in the art of academic critique, have once again been asked by the university to embark on the daunting yet supremely important task of evaluating our...

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  • December 18, 2023

By Sue Donnem If you’re a big sports person, such as myself, then you surely remember Manute Bol clogging up the paint back in the day. God, the 80s…what a time to be alive! Those pesky guards always tried to drive on Manute, but he would send their shot into...

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  • December 7, 2023

By Nick Gebo NASHVILLE, TN – A crowd of stunned monks gathered around Alumni Lawn late Thursday evening as Zach Pro, a Vanderbilt junior who reportedly started practicing Buddhism just two weeks ago, appeared to reach a state of enlightenment in record time. “I have never seen anything remotely comparable....

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  • December 6, 2023

By Sam Sliman Sponsored by Johnson & Johnson Look I know it sounds bad, but just hear me out. I understand that your terminal disease is easily preventable. Trust me, I get it — I had food poisoning just last semester. But only like 1.5 million people die from vaccine...

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  • December 5, 2023