HOD Major Shuns Consulting, Hailed as Hero


NASHVILLE, TN – Vanderbilt University junior Derek Derekson never thought he would become a campus hero, but the consulting recruiting season has turned him into one nonetheless.

Derekson, a Human and Organizational Development major, had seen posters all across campus for the Deloitte recruiting events and noted the many info sessions for consulting firms on Doreways. His classes had started with everyone murmuring to one another about which companies they were applying for, speculating how many interns Bain & Company would be taking for next summer, and how many networking calls they had scheduled for the next week. Derekson played along, telling other HOD students that he would see them at the McKinsey info session, and that he had been doing practice case interviews for weeks.

But he hadn’t been.

Derekson told The Slant that he “never wanted to go into consulting” and that he played along just so that “people would stop asking why [he] was in HOD.” But just one week ago, the day after the Deloitte info sessions, it became too much, and he snapped.

Classmate Connor Sultan was in the room when it happened. “I was just telling Derek about my meeting with my friend’s former sugar daddy who is a senior level consultant at McKinsey, but when I asked how the Deloitte session went, he freaked,” said Sultan.

Derekson admits he “lost it. I stood up in front of the class and I admitted the truth; I wasn’t applying to Deloitte, I hadn’t been practicing case interviews,” the junior recounted.

Sultan said the atmosphere in the room immediately turned cold. “A hush fell over the room. It was bad enough at first, but when he said he didn’t want to go into consulting at all, the mood darkened.” The professor reportedly asked him to leave, but was interrupted when another student, Millie Becker, stood up clapping. Becker, also a junior, hailed Derekson as a hero, praising how brave he was for admitting and accepting his truth. According to reports, Becker’s clapping became contagious, and much of the rest of the class stood and lauded Derekson’s confession in a very “Oh captain, my captain”-esque moment of solidarity amongst the students.

Over the course of just a few days, tales of his heroism spread like wildfire across campus; he became a Dank New Rand meme, written about in the bathroom stalls at Tin Roof, and some eager fans even took to knocking door-to-door Jehovah’s witness style to spread the news.

A minority of HOD students and much of the rest of the campus have continued to exalt Derekson, and a statue is scheduled to be erected in his likeness by the end of the semester.

  • September 28, 2017