By Nick Gebo NASHVILLE, TN – A crowd of stunned monks gathered around Alumni Lawn late Thursday evening as Zach Pro, a Vanderbilt junior who reportedly started practicing Buddhism just two weeks ago, appeared to reach a state of enlightenment in record time. “I have never seen anything remotely comparable....
By Sam Sliman Sponsored by Johnson & Johnson Look I know it sounds bad, but just hear me out. I understand that your terminal disease is easily preventable. Trust me, I get it — I had food poisoning just last semester. But only like 1.5 million people die from vaccine...
By Kyle Bettencourt, Vice President of Kappa Epsilon Gamma (KEG) I’m gearing up for my third winter in Tennessee and, to be honest, it hasn’t gotten any easier since freshman year. I’m from Orange County, California; I just don’t really do cold like that. “Oh, the weather outside is frightful…”...
By Danielle Bernstein “Oh no, you go first,” I politely say as I hold the door open with nothing but my feminine prowess. The man doesn’t know what to do! He is frozen at the threshold, his masculinity challenged by this simple act of female chivalry. After a 46-second standoff,...
By O. Blivious Are you chronically single? Have you never felt the warm embrace of a woman? Well, just like you sorry losers, I used to lay in my bed every night and cry myself to sleep wondering if I’d ever reach the peak of my existence and get a...
