Vanderbilt University Theatre Recruits Freshman for Faking Sobriety During Parents’ Weekend


NASHVILLE, TN – In preparation for VU Theatre’s modern adaptation of Macbeth, the VUT casting crew actively scouted freshmen who showed a simultaneous “failure to control their alcohol consumption” and ability to “feign composure” for the role of the Porter, the humorous doorkeeper.  VUT’s casting director, who responded under the condition of anonymity, stated that “[VU theatre] strategically stationed lookouts outside Student Accountability” in order to “pick out freshmen” who were written up the previous weekend.

After none of the VUT crew’s selections panned out, the casting director took her search to Peabody Lawn. Four minutes into her lookout, she ran into freshman Chad Richardson.  The casting director told The Slant that she first saw Chad “while he was giving his parents a tour around Commons on Peabody Lawn during Parents’ Weekend.” Sources close to freshman Chad Richardson of North 5 have reported that, in advance of  his parents’ arrival, “Chad was able to cover up vomit stains from the previous night by readjusting his furniture, and Chad creatively dislodged a ceiling panel in his room in order to hide two handles of vodka and an eighth from view.” From just a first impression, “Chad’s ability to discuss nonexistent study habits with his parents was indicative of strong acting abilities,” commented the casting director. “I expect Chad to be an invaluable member of the cast. I recognized him from a Mayfield party this past weekend and he looked sober despite taking eight shots.”

Chad revealed to The Slant that his remarkable acting skills “weren’t that big of a deal” since he has a “huge” tolerance for alcohol that “basically makes him immune.” He suggested that he “wasn’t even faking sobriety as [he] was truly sober.” Nevertheless, the casting director was enamored with his commanding presence and acting skills. Tickets for Macbeth will be on sale for $7 in the Sarratt Box Office starting Dec. 1st. Chad will be making his stage debut in the Second Act.

  • October 12, 2016