God, I can’t wait to get into one of these frats so I can be myself again. This whole rush thing is so fucking superficial. I spend every rush event being fake nice to strangers and I can’t figure out if it’ll even be worth it. I just want to...
Late in the second quarter of the Vanderbilt-Florida game, a fight erupted after a questionable hit on a Vanderbilt punt return. When tending to the injured player, Vanderbilt head coach Derek Mason and Florida’s Dan Mullen got into a verbal spat that led to players holding them back to avoid...
This past week, Vanderbilt Administration revealed the design for the new dormitory building on campus – a giant middle finger pointed at Carmichael Towers. “We wanted to preserve the tradition of Vanderbilt completely shitting on Towers in any way possible,” said the project’s chief architect. “We feel that the middle...
Congrats, you joined some bullshit club to make yourself seem like a “well-rounded” Vanderbilt student! Now it is time to do some shitty ice-breaking exercise, but this can be challenging for a boring fucker such as yourself. So, here are ten fun fact templates to help mask the mundanity of...
VANDERBILT UNIVERSITY, COMMONS – Friday night, a group of freshmen walked into their Commons dorm to find the security guard alert and sober. The guard, who was sitting upright and fully awake at his post, was reportedly competent and attentive. A spokesperson for Allied Barton has since commended the heroic...
