We’re Only Three Emotional Breakdowns Away from Thanksgiving


Friends, with Spooky Season coming to an end and No-Shave November starting off, I can already see the leaves falling, smell the turkey cooking and hear my grandfather screaming at my lesbian aunt about how her flannels are destroying America or whatever. That’s right—as I remind myself about five times a day, Thanksgiving is right around the corner, and that means I only have about three more mental breakdowns to get through before I get to go home!

From checking that bookmarked countdown until my flight home on Friday, November 16th at exactly 4:35 pm, to constantly reminding myself that I only have to suffer through one more week of Campus Dining, I can rest easy knowing that I’m so close to hearing about how much better all my friends’ college lives are and spending time with the family I was so keen to ignore three months ago. There’s no way the delicate façade I’ve created with my Snapchat stories and assurances that “everything’s going great!” will come crashing down.

I mean, who doesn’t love Thanksgiving, right? It’s like a better version of fall break! I’ll be at home, everything will be perfect, and my family and I definitely won’t be fighting again after a couple of days—it’ll just be a week of pure bliss and relaxation!

And sure, Thanksgiving’s only a week-long respite from shower shoes, but right after that, it’ll be the Christmas season, which means only two more crying fits (alright, three if you count my breakdown in the LAX Terminal 1 bathroom at the prospect of going back to having zero personal space) until I get to go home again! Sure, we have finals, but, like, that sucks for everyone, and if everybody’s suffering, then it doesn’t count. It’s fine. Really, it’s fine.

Just remember, folks, if you can count the number of minutes until the sweet release of break, the rest of the semester can’t scare you. Stay strong, and who knows—maybe by January, the Office of Student Care Coordination will actually have some appointment availability. Even if they don’t, it’ll only be like four more months until summer. Happy Fourth of July!

  • November 13, 2018