Donald Trump’s Hair Becomes #2 Rated Cat Toy Sold on Amazon

As Amazon gears up to release their 2016 second quarter sales reports, many experts believe that reports will be bolstered by the surging sales of Donald Trump’s hair repurposed as a cat toy. Tammy, 57, Indiana suburbanite and owner of three cats comments, “The girls just love rolling around in Mr. Trump’s hair. I come home from my part-time job as a Walmart greeter, pour myself a big glass of moscato, and pull the hair out of the closet and just throw it on the floor. The girls just roll around, chew on it, chase it around when it starts to run away. The whole night is just a thrill ride.”

“The idea came after I was watching a Republican debate and a close-up of Donald Trump came on the screen,” Jonathon Scott, VP of Sales at Amazon, commented. “Not only did my cat jump at him and crack my TV, my daughter also screamed and had nightmares for the next few days. I knew that I needed to put something like that on the market.”

In the category of cat toys, Trump’s hair trails only Tails from the Litter Box, a series of short stories written by Jane Clawsten.