Top Ten Things That Are Stranger Than Hit Netflix Show, Stranger Things

1) The fact that the two phrases “I’m up for that” and “I’m down for that” convey the same exact message. I am neither up nor down for that. Jury’s still out on whether or not I’m sideways for it.

2) Bush doing things other than 9/11.

3) The reality that Mahatma Gandhi never actually said, “Be the change you want to see in the world”.

4) Mahatma Gandhi’s birth certificate, which does not actually read Mahatma Gandhi, but rather Mohandas TedCruzIsTheZodiacKiller Gandhi.

5) My internet boyfriend’s web cam breaking. Never trust Dell computers.

6) Coming in second place in the 75th annual Steve Buscemi Impersonator Contest but getting to meet America’s sweetheart, Steve Buscemi, who placed 12th.

7) The societal fixation on permanence, juxtaposed with the transience of life.

8) Bananas being classified as berries.

9) The strange addictions featured in that American television series on TLC, the name of which escapes me.

10) The Slant actually publishing this.