VANDERBILT UNIVERSITY, COMMONS – Friday night, a group of freshmen walked into their Commons dorm to find the security guard alert and sober. The guard, who was sitting upright and fully awake at his post, was reportedly competent and attentive. A spokesperson for Allied Barton has since commended the heroic...
News
Chancellor Nicholas Zeppos has announced an ambitious initiative to pop the colossal bubble surrounding campus with a 95-meter long needle. The needle will be 3D printed in the Wond’ry over the course of two months and eventually attached to a tower crane. Dubbed the “Vanderbubble,” the giant globule has famously...
Welp. They’ve gone and done it again. Just when I thought that I’d be able to finally use one of my three sides on a hearty helping of human flesh, Vanderbilt snatches that dream out of my hands much like I snatch babies from their mothers and eat them. All-you-can-eat...
Vanderbilt’s ranking on Princeton Review’s Happiest Students list fell from #1 to #3 this year, falling behind The College of William and Mary and the University of Oklahoma.
Folks, I was walking back from Rand when I saw one of the most disgusting things I’ve seen in a long, long time. Over the summer, while I was looking for Mollie Tibbetts’ murderer, Zeppos and his gang of ELITES on the Board of Trustees were implementing a system of...