By: Julia Schmitt Your grandmother, my grandmother and America’s Matt Gaetz agree: you were a hot piece of ass in seventh grade! Thigh gap? Braless? Grossly asleep in a world waterboarded in serpentine patriarchal injustice? Bummer, seems like you really let yourself go by letting your body develop with age. ...
Life
By: Cameron Peloso I’ve never been the type of person who buys into fad diets. I mean, did I go pescatarian during that period of 2017-2018 where everyone was cutting meat out of their diet? Yes. But other than that, I practice what I recently learned on TikTok is called...
By: Keiji Chan Classes this semester got you down? Putting too much emphasis on the “play hard” portion of “work hard, play hard” school? Not putting enough emphasis on either and instead focusing your efforts towards hunting down and capturing that pesky, frugal scammer known as the tooth fairy? If...
By: Connor Pattinson In a recent poll of students from the Lone Star State, most of them were failing at least one class. This is, of course, because they are incompetent buffoons. More importantly, however, they were blissfully unaware that they were failing after week six of classes. One Texas...
NASHVILLE, TN – Just days after Panhellenic Preview Day dealt a massive blow to the feminist movement on Vanderbilt’s campus, a new hope emerged on the morning of November 17th, in an 11:10 a.m. MW upper level HOD class. Annie Albright, a senior from Dallas, was reported as taking what...
