Letter From The Regime
ATTENTION READER,
This is a message of the utmost importance for the security of our great nation.
We have become aware that there are certain dissidents on this campus opposed to President Trump’s noble fight for freedom. Effective immediately, all Vanderbilt University affiliates must register themselves — either as lawful patriots or illegal enemies of the state. It is IMPERATIVE that you fill out the following form. Your responses will be instantaneously sent to the Department of Homeland Security’s newly formed Secret Police division for review, powered by X AI’s newest GrokTM model. You will receive an official notice of your AmericaFirst Status by post courtesy of XX_Snale_Mail_69_XX (formerly USPS). It will not be necessary to provide your mailing address. Elon has your social security number lol.
Praise be to our fearless and ruggedly handsome DJT,
J.D. Vance
