In a daring twist that can only be described as morbidly inventive, Vanderbilt University has completed construction on its Student Life Center, revealing the highly anticipated counterpart, Student Death Center. The decision, overwhelmingly backed by the Dishonor Council, seeks to redefine the traditional student journey by asserting that college should...
By Indy Hauter I don’t belong in this world. As a 20-year-old experiencing adulthood for the first time, I can plainly see just how messed up our planet is, and I hate it. Climate change is causing annual forest fires in California, politicians would rather see their opponents in their...
By Connor Pattinson OK. You guys ready? Let’s do this. To set the scene, on Feb. 2, 1877, the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club embarked on their expedition to Phil’s house located at Who-Gives-A-Shit-It’s-A-Groundhog Lane, Gobbler’s Knob, PA 15767. Crowds gather around to watch Punxsutawney Phil emerge from his little hole to...
By Christina Lopez Hello, my name is Christina. I want to tell you a tale about a missed job opportunity. After going through what happened a million times in my head, I wish I could go back and do things differently. But for now, I want to share my story...
By Megan McGrath and Justice Nathaniel Thomas The Supreme Court has finally issued an opinion in the case Harrington v. Purdue Pharma. The verdict orders the Sackler family, former owners of Purdue Pharma — the company responsible for manufacturing and distributing the drug OxyContin — to pay $6 billion to...
