According to anxious watchers, freshman Jane Smith has been typing away on her phone in Sutherland House’s fifth floor common room for six hours and counting. When asked about how long she thought the phone break would last, she replied that she “probably wouldn’t take that long.” “Yeah, all I need to do is start working on my paper that’s due tomorrow --don’t worry … [Read more...] about Report: Girl on Phone Waiting to Start Work Any Day Now
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VUPD: Where they at?
While campus assaults are now as common as squirrels and bad grades, I'm starting to wonder if VUPD actually exists. VUPD is the second largest police force in Tennessee-- there are probably more Vandy police officers than there are people passed out near Rahna's on a Thursday night-- but after all these incidents, I just wanna know: where they at?? So I took this matter … [Read more...] about VUPD: Where they at?
Fall Break Just Ended, But I Still Want to Die
Photo by the Vanderbilt Hustler Multimedia team The start of fall break: a glorious time when everyone says “I’m going to get so ahead on all my work!” and then ends up watching a vegan chili recipe video on repeat for 13 straight hours - they’re mesmerizing, trust me. Many Vanderbilt students went home during break, but for those of us whose parents don’t love them, we … [Read more...] about Fall Break Just Ended, But I Still Want to Die
New Study Finds Everyone Else Had a Better Summer Than You
NASHVILLE, TN - With the start of a new school year comes the shocking revelation made in a recent study suggesting that everyone else had a better summer than you. The study, conducted by researchers in Vanderbilt’s Department of Psychology, has proved that your summer was statistically worse than those of your classmates. Though this has been theorized by fringe members … [Read more...] about New Study Finds Everyone Else Had a Better Summer Than You
Snapchat Friend Watches Every One of Your Concert Videos
Since posted, your thorough documentation of the musical event you attended last night has not gone unappreciated. Alfred Johnson, 20, reported being overjoyed at the sight of the many recordings you posted on your story. “I wasn’t able to go to the show, but all those Snapchat videos -- they made me feel like I was right there in the 55th row bobbing up and down off-beat!” … [Read more...] about Snapchat Friend Watches Every One of Your Concert Videos