By Miles Borowsky and Julia Schmitt Starting virtual recruitment this weekend? Here are The Slant's top tips to score the house of your dreams! Talk about the latest superspreader event and why it was the best party you’ve been to in weeks!Make sure your Cartier Love Bracelet clatters against your keyboard with each and every keystroke.Visit this website.Have your cute … [Read more...] about The Slant’s Guide To Zoom Recruitment
By Miles Borowsky and Justine Del Monte In 2019, Vanderbilt shocked students and faculty with the announcement of a plan to abolish Carmichael Towers. This was met with immediate support by many who believed that the social climate had progressed past the need for such an institution. One of the biggest problems with Towers, as identified in a July 32 Hustler guest … [Read more...] about STAFF EDITORIAL: Don’t Abolish Towers. Let Us Reform It.
Recent studies from the CDC demonstrate that universities, on average, have seen a 96 percent drop in COVID cases after placing stickers in front of doors featuring instructions such as “Exit Only,” “Stand Here,” or “Do Not Step Foot Inside This Building Without a Mask or You Will Get Sniped.” Vanderbilt has taken this a step further and demonstrated exemplary … [Read more...] about Scientists Attribute Recent Breakthrough in Eradicating COVID-19 to Roundabouts and Up-Only Staircases
By now, we’ve all heard that we’ll be returning to campus this fall, but with social distancing restrictions out the wazoo. Perhaps you lost your shit when you learned that you’ll have to schedule your meals a day in advance with only a 15-minute timeframe to pick up dinner, or maybe you contemplated transferring when you learned that we’ll be having classes on evenings AND … [Read more...] about Fall 2020 Restrictions Vanderbilt Hasn’t Released Yet
First of all, I need to apologize. Neither of us thought we’d be in this position—but alas, here we are. Here I sit, at home in my queen-size bed with freshly cleaned sheets (thanks mom. God knows the last time I washed my sheets at school), while you’re about to face quite possibly the most excruciating, arduous, repulsive task you’ve ever been confronted with. I pity the fact … [Read more...] about A Letter to the UPS Employee Packing Up My Dorm