February 2019

2019 US News rankings reveal that Duke has usurped Vanderbilt’s top ranking as “The Harvard of the South.” Instead, Vanderbilt has been demoted to a slightly lower ranking: “The Yale of the Super Remote Chicago Suburbs.” The magazine warns readers not to get this confused with Yale University, which was...

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  • February 25, 2019

With top-ranked financial aid, and America’s Slap-Happiest Students™, Vanderbilt is no slouch when it comes to record-breaking. Here are some of the most impressive records held by our university and its students: Longest Continuous Cry in Front of Esteemed Research Professor 2 hours and 13 minutes, just long enough to...

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  • February 18, 2019

Ever since making a blog with all my besties, life has just been so unfair. People called me “privileged,” “wasteful,” and “a bitch” (bad bitch), but if I’m just loaded with daddy’s money, I think a more accurate term would be “Vandy student”. I finally found a way to show...

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  • February 18, 2019

For this latest edition of Around the Loop, the Slant Staff interviewed folks about their V-day plans. Sam, 18, virgin — HAHA we’re just fucking with you. We’d never ask a virgin what they’re doing on Valentine’s Day. That’s so sad. We care about our readers, and wouldn’t dream of...

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  • February 14, 2019

Use your Commodore Card to treat your significant other to any of the fine restaurants available to you via Taste of Nashville. Nama is expensive, don’t use REAL money! Picket outside of Zeppos’s office for fairer dining worker wages. Seize the heart of your sweetheart by seizing the means of...

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  • February 13, 2019