Donald Trump Jr. recently made headlines when he used a bowl of Skittles containing a few poisonous Skittles as a metaphor for Syrian refugees coming to America. Despite some backlash, Trump Jr. has stood by his comment. However, we at The Slant have composed a list of metaphors he could have possibly used that are slightly more… tasteful.
10. Tropical Skittles – Adds a tropical element to his original metaphor. Because everyone knows that Aruba is more fun than poison.
9. Your creepy drunk uncle at Christmas – You have to let him in, but you don’t really want to.
8. Tiny hands – something else that doesn’t give Sr. enough support.
7. Twitter – one stupid tweet ruins everyone else’s enjoyable experience of pictures of food.
6. Obama’s Birth Certificate – The Trumps aren’t sure where it’s from, so it must be dangerous.
5. Vanderbilt Football – trying to find a Syrian refugee that is a terrorist is like trying to find a ‘Dores win.
4. M&Ms – the original colored candy is always a better option.
3. Paper – ‘Cause at this point, why not. Makes about as much sense as Skittles.
2. Farts – The ones that you don’t hear (see) are the deadliest.
1. Donald Trump Jr. himself – Because he has a view on this subject that no one shares.